Monday, February 14, 2011

Like baby, baby, baby ohh

currently listen to: one time by JUSTIN BIEBER
and i'm grooving to it. go youtube it and see if you can resist movement. DO NOT JUDGE ME.

completely outrage about the grammy's. its not even that i'm being bias but it is complete bullshit that Lady Antebellum won record and song of the year. i'm not against country, heck i listen to taylor swift (yes questionable i know). but that song was honestly shit. the lyrics are horrible, its got a over redundant crappy message about love. compare it to Eminem's song, recovery was his first album to be completely sober off of everything. went to jail and rehab, had a mediocre last record, and came back better than ever. Plus "love the way lie" (i don't like rihanna) considering the message, the words, the instrumentals, the singers' background, critical and popular success, it did not win a single grammy. the grammy association has been criticized for shutting out country music, well um...there's the COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS, go there if you want an award. i'm writing to the grammy people. this is pure outrage.

alright stuff i found on the web:

seeing how my home state is ranked as the worst drivers in the country, people don't understand what a culture shock it is for a masshole to drive in other states. case in point-this is a guide i found to driving in Mass.
  1. Always look right and left before proceeding through a green light.
  2. When on a one way street, stay to the right to allow for oncoming traffic to pass.
  3. Never, ever stop for a pedestrian unless he flings himself under the wheels of your car.
  4. The first parking space you see will be the last parking space you see. Grab it.
  5. Learn to swerve abruptly. Boston is the home of slalom driving, thanks to the Department of Transportation, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.
  6. Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive bodywork.
  7. Double-park in the North End of Boston and South Boston, unless triple-parking is available.
  8. Always look both ways when running a red light.
  9. Honk your horn the instant the light changes.
  10. Breakdown lanes are not for breaking down, but for speeding, especially during rush hour. Breakdown lanes may also end without warning causing traffic jams as people merge back in.
  11. If you should break down, allow your vehicle to come to a stop in the center lane. If road conditions are hazardous, exit your vehicle, without looking, and stand next to it, with your back to oncoming traffic.
  12. Never use directional signals when changing lanes. They only warn other drivers to speed up and not let you in.
  13. To signal a lane change, look in the direction you're about to go, as you do so. Wearing a baseball cap is considered an extra safety measure.
  14. Making eye contact revokes your right of way.
  15. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right.
  16. Whenever possible, stop in the middle of a crosswalk to ensure inconveniencing as many pedestrians as possible. And if a pedestrian ahead of you steps into the road, speed up loudly and chase them up on the curb. Pedestrians have no rights.
  17. On a multi-lane highway, always drive in the left lane, even if there are others wanting to pass. Stay in the left lane until the last possible instant before cutting across all lanes to the exit.
  18. When making a left turn at an intersection with a red light, glare at the oncoming drivers, inch your way into the intersection, and floor it when the green light from the other direction turns yellow.
  19. When merging, floor it, as you hit the "on ramp" and proceed immediately to the furthest left hand lane.
  20. When road conditions are hazardous, swerve in and out of lanes, to pass slower moving vehicles.
  21. Communicating with other drivers and pedestrians is important. Gesture often.
  22. The furthest right lane is reserved for passing. The furthest left lane is reserved for slower moving vehicles.
  23. Always bring your cell phone with you. Highway driving is a perfect time to chat with your friends and loved ones.
  24. If you miss your exit, stop abruptly and back up.
  25. When another car pulls up close behind you and "flashes their brights", slam on your breaks.
  26. When entering a tunnel, always slow down and pause before entering, even if there is no traffic or reason for delay.
  27. When faced with a lane detour, due to construction, always pass as many complying vehicles as possible, wait until the last possible second, then swerve into the specified lane.
  28. Be prepared for abundant construction detours.
  29. Taxi Cab drivers are highly trained professionals. Observe and learn from their masterful techniques and driving skills.
  30. Only those pedestrians not looking where they're going, head and eyes fixed firmly forward, are allowed to cross in front of traffic. Be sure to "break" hard and stop as close to them as possible.
    • Tip: Only pedestrians crossing within "Cross Walks" have legal rights. Pedestrians outside of "Cross Walks" are "fair game".
and i now leave you with this

yes, i had to do it. did you just throw up multiple times? i'm still recovering from it. that is 30 seconds of your life that you will never get back. you are welcome.

hey remember sabrina the teenage witch...?
and throwback song of the day:

oh my god, the days of my young glory...is it sad i still remember some of the words?

peace to the bumcrease,
Fiquid

1 comment:

Jess said...

Firstly,I'm just going to let you know that I listened to that justin bieber song and did not move, except my mouth to laugh.
agree about the grammys though I didn't even watch it 'cause it wasn't anywhere to be found on my tv.
Nice driving guide, I'll keep those in mind when I learn to drive.